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| don't know what' |
sometimes words that came out from your mouth are not what you want to meant ...not that message that you want to convey and receive ... sometimes you pretend that you can but inside ... you can't even move a little ... you tend to be strong and tough as a defense of your own sake ... but you know that you are scared to death even say the word or think of the possible scenario ... jealous of the pain , hurt , love of others ... but not want to try and be on those scenes ... but still missing and wanting to feel it again ... maybe scared and maybe not ready yet ... like jumping into the water from the highest cliff that you imagine ... drowning yourself into the water ... trying to submerge all the badges that you load from the years of pain ... how can't move by the memories of the past ... that actually should be forgotten ... don't want the present ruin everything that are now heading through ...see no start but see the end ... and skip all the stages ... just know the end ... and making boundaries ... how can it be ... if you let these things to happened as a wall and a defense from all the fears that you see ...why fear ... why not let things go on their way ... why conclude even you have not experience it yet and if that happen just let it happened ... no more fantasies , no more to unreal ... have to face the reality and fact ... that life should always moving ... no one can't be left behind unless you let your life to be left behind ... but to those who left behind they put end to their own growth even they just started growing ... making a period to their own story ... move is the key word ... and try is an experience ... so why not move and try ... at least once again you feel life ... live , create and experience '
